Controlling people can make our lives miserable. They like to have a say in all that we do and give their opinions in our personal matters. This type of person can be very frustrating to deal with. It can even ruin your life. Perhaps you have a spouse, relative, friend, co-worker or neighbor that is controlling. You may love the person but are so perturbed with this person that you are trying to avoid them. You may have even thought about divorce.
When a person has to control and be involved in another persons life they often have what we call a “Spirit of Jezebel” on them. We learned in Part 1 where this comes from. It is demonic and greatly influences and can even control a person’s personality. This doesn’t mean the person is ‘possessed’ with this spirit. It simply means that somewhere along the line this demonic spirit has set up a ‘stronghold’ in this persons mind.
Someone with a Spirit of Jezebel usually never knows that they have this spirit. They just consider themselves very “opinionated, confident, strong-willed, domineering, helpful, overbearing,etc. .” When a person has this demonic influence they are driven to do and say things that are controlling. They feel if they don’t say something, do something, change something or have some sort of control in a situation that things will not go right. They feel compelled that they must have their hands in the affairs of others – often with the best of intent – Never realizing that they are pushing people further away and hurting many individuals in the process.
Because most people are bowled over by these people they don’t know how best to handle them. Often these people will just avoid the person with the controlling spirit. Sometimes this is not possible such as in the case of marriage, children, siblings, parents and co-workers. This can lead to destruction of relationships, severance of ties and much disfunctionality in homes. It can be very difficult to live in the same house with a person that has this spirit of them.
I read of a young pastor who had hired someone to beat his wife to death. Outwardly they seemed to have a healthy, normal marriage – except for one point – the wife incessantly nagged her husband. It could be big things or little things – she always had an opinion in the matter. Relatives often noticed how strained the husband was in these instances – it seemed like a quiet time bomb ticking away. Finally, he could take no more. He hired a hit man to kill her. He is now serving a life term in prison. A spirit of Jezebel can torment a person to do things they would never consider – yet they are often pushed over the edge by this relentless force that ruins relationships and destroys our peace.
Some of the signs that indicate a person has a Spirit of Jezebel are: Physical abuse, verbal abuse, sarcasm, cynicism, nagging, intimidation, name calling and control. If you have a person in your life that has put any of these abuses on you it is time to recognize that there may be a spirit of Jezebel behind this treatment.
The first step in dealing with this spirit is recognition. The second step is to continually pray for the courage to confront the person each time they attack you. It may be as simple as “Please don’t yell at me like that.” or “Stop speaking disrespectfully to me.” or “Don’t EVER make fun of me again.” or “I don’t need you to keep telling me what to do.” or “Stop correcting me when I make mistakes.”
Stop the control. Stand up for yourself. Pray for the courage to not be intimidated. Ask God to teach you how valuable you are. Memorize bible verses that remind you of how precious you are to God. If you don’t give up you will find that you can overcome the Spirit of Jezebel and no longer be intimidated by it.