It is tough for a Godly woman to dress appropriately in this day and age. There is so much sexuality that it can be very confusing. Here are a few tips that might help you in your quest for appropriate dress.
Anything with the word “sex” should be held in high esteem. Sexy means: “Sexually attractive or exciting, sexually aroused.”
When we ask if Christian women should be dressing “sexy” we now are asking “Is it okay for a contemporary Christian woman to dress like everyone else? ” The answer is “No.” Here is why. In 1 Tim. 2:9 Paul said
“I want women to dress with proper clothing, MODESTLY and discreetly.”
Modesty: “Dressing or behaving so as to avoid impropriety or indecency, especially to avoid attracting sexual attention – not revealing or emphasizing the figure.” Discreet means to be “distinct or separate.”
“What’s the big deal” you say? “I have a cute figure and I am not ashamed of it. God gave us these human bodies and we shouldn’t feel like we have to hide them. If someone gets turned on by me just being myself then it’s their problem – they are the one’s with inappropriate thoughts.” Au contraire my friend – you are wrong. You see – if you have chosen to take the title of “Christian” you are no longer your own. You were bought with a great price. When you chose to follow Christ you said “Lord, I give you my heart, mind and life. I’m yours Lord.” Did you forget?
The next problem is that Paul spoke very specifically in 1 Corinthians about this issue. He said that if we do ANYTHING that could even possibly cause a fellow brother or sister to sin we shouldn’t do it. You may not see an issue with a bikini – but if it puts lustful thoughts in a man’s head – you have just caused sin in your brother life. You have now sinned. One day you will give account for that.
What women see as attractive men may see as alluring.
You have the freedom and responsibility to live a life which reflects whom YOU have chosen to represent – Christ. It’s no longer about you, it’s now all about Him.
“He died for all that we in turn might no longer live for ourselves but for HIM.” 2 Cor. 5:15
There you have it. It’s no longer about you – it’s about Christ and following Him, His ways and what establishes His kingdom.
Is dressing immodestly sin? Yes. There is no way around it. God’s Word tells us clearly to dress modestly – therefore if you or I don’t we are in sin and will one day give account for our actions.
What is immodest? If you are showing any parts of your breasts, even cleavage, that is immodest. So we have to look at the fact that bikini’s are typically very revealing. Best to avoid them unless the top is covering ALL your breasts and the bottoms are more the shorts type. Bathing suits are best – prudish you say? Yup – it’s not about us, remember?
Next, anything that reveals your butt or crotch or below your belly button is immodest. Clothes that are so tight they reveal every line of your body are inappropriate. If you can’t pull your clothes with two fingers – they are too tight.
Watch the yoga pants – if you go out in them wear a long sweater or jacket to cover you butt. Several men recently remarked that they were looking forward to spring because it was “Yoga pants season.” The men were obviously sexually aroused seeing all the outlines of women’s crotches and butts. Don’t make your brother stumble.
Short dresses, skirts and shorts can be beautiful, unless they are too far up the thigh. A few inches above the knee is fine but when you start to get above the thigh area that is totally inappropriate. I don’t care how great or thin your legs are – this is not about you trying to be eye candy for every male that will see you. NO SHORT SHORTS! Use wisdom. If you are working out in a gym then higher shorts are going to be more acceptable there than just walking down the street. Always take into consideration where you are and who is around you.
Here is one of the best ways to know if you should be wearing something or not. When you put on an outfit, a bikini or whatever you’re planning on wearing – stand for one minute in front of the mirror. Close your eyes and see yourself standing before Jesus. You are standing with the same clothes you are now wearing. How do you feel? Are you embarrassed? If you have a complete peace – then wear it.
Why would a christian woman want to wear revealing clothes? To get attention from the opposite sex. Many women are starved for attention – attention from their husbands and boyfriends. Dressing sexy is the quickest way for others to notice you. In reality it means you struggle with a spirit of insecurity. Until that thing is dealt with it will always be a struggle for you to dress appropriately. If this is you – begin to fast and pray that God begin to heal those wounds of rejection and insecurity. In time, as you heal, you will find you no longer need to garner attention in this way.
Quoting Christian Today “A married woman should feel freedom to wear anything and nothing in the privacy of her bedroom. But when she walks out of the house, she needs to be considerate of modesty. Just because your husband can look at your body, that doesn’t mean other men should.”
Begin to pray:“Lord show me how to dress appropriately. Teach me what is modest and what glorifies your kingdom.”
God is faithful. He will show you. If you don’t feel a sense of shame or conviction then most likely that is God’s way of saying it’s okay. I have learned to ask someone how I look if I am uncertain. I ask my husband or my daughters. They know that I want an honest answer – not to coddle or flatter me.
God doesn’t want us to all dress like Amish women. We don’t have to take it that far. What He does require is modestly and purity. It’s that simple.
Dress stylish. Be beautiful. Look fabulous. But don’t abuse the freedom Christ gave you to ruin your Christian walk and very possibly that of another. Be wise.
What are you wearing today?