The Word “NO” is NOT a Bad Word

“No” is the most powerful word that you can speak. “No” tells others that you have clear boundaries that must be respected. “No” tells others that you are valuable and you care to protect yourself, your time, your family and what you believe in. “No” means that you understand how to take care of yourself and the things that God has entrusted to you. “No” means you love yourself.


Too many people, particularly believers, think that by saying “NO” we are mean, inconsiderate or harsh. Quite the opposite. 

Paul said in Eph. 5:29You should never hate yourself. But you should love, nurture and take care of yourself just as Christ takes care of the church.”

How many times have you not wanted to participate in something but you begrudgingly did it anyways? How many times did you not agree with someone on something  yet you never said “No.” How many times have you gotten frustrated with yourself because you committed yourself to do something (such as volunteer work or helping out at the church) when you really didn’t have the time? When you did these things it was sin. You see the bible says we are to lay aside falsehood and speak the truth.

When you don’t feel true to something in your heart but you go ahead and do it anyways because you don’t want to hurt someones feelings or you are scared or you are intimidated – then you are living falsehood – you are feeling one way in your heart but you are acting as if you are ok with the situation. Falsehood is wrong. That is why God desires for us to stand up for our lives by saying “No.” It tells others that we have feelings that should be respected. 

By speaking up how you truly feel inside you are now protecting yourself. When you really don’t believe that you should be doing something but don’t say “No” you are in sin – you are not using the God-given power to let others know how your REALLY feel. 

“No, I don’t think I can help out at the school.” “No, I can’t come over today.” “No, don’t touch me like that ever again.” “No, don’t ever speak to me like that again.” “I said no and I mean it.” 

If you are struggling with saying “No” then I want you to begin to say the above sentences out loud each day for a month. Begin to add new sentences that apply to your situation.

What happens if people don’t respect your “No?” Then you are in a Toxic Relationship  and need to get out before it destroys you.

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